Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Literature is not a Cold, Dead Place…

For as long as I can remember I have always loved to read. I have always found the process of literature to be fascinating. I love the use of words and I love the theories and the ideas that need to be used in order to understand and to use language. Growing up, I was constantly told to get my nose out of the books and to start paying more attention to what was happening around me. I was, and still am, terribly oblivious when I have a book in my hands. The funny thing I found, though, is that the more I read, the more I began to feel like I understand the world in which I live. They say art imitates life, and I found this to be true when comparing the pages of my favourite books to what I experienced on a daily basis.  I even majored in English. And some so-called “educated” people ask me: “Who does that”?
I usually meet these weird people who get competitive about the difficulty of their degrees. The accepted line for them is that “Science is harder than Arts”, and for them, everything is harder than Literature. As for them, literature is only about novels. And they call themselves “literate”. Well, I suggest them to at least go through Encyclopaedia and read.  I bet, after going through it, you won’t even dare to pursue your career in English.
If you really want to understand literature, you can’t just read a few books or poems over and over (“Hamlet,” “Anna Karenina,” “The Waste Land”). Instead, you have to work with hundreds or even thousands of texts at a time. By turning those books into data, and analysing that data, you can discover facts about literature in general.
They say – Life of Arts’ students is so damn easy.
I beg to differ and let me clarify. Us - Arts students have to decide to work. We have to get ourselves up, preferably in the morning. We have to choose to do today what we could do at 2am tomorrow. We have to turn down a pub trip in favour of an evening alone with our books. Hangover and exhausted, who wouldn’t rather sit watching acid drip into alkaline for a couple of hours, rather than trawling through Derrida or Greenblatt. Like any other academic, there is not really a pro typical day. Some days are mostly teaching, others mostly writing, some mostly reading while others might be service. We have to set a goal for what we want to get done in a week. We have to manage our choice of projects. This leads us to jump from project to project chasing after the “shiny new object”. You can imagine how this hampers our productivity. Personally, I now try to decide what enters my portfolio in three stages. First, I make sure that any new idea leverages an area of my expertise. I want to avoid one-off projects that require me to learn an entirely new literature each time. Second, I go ahead and write a potential contribution paragraph to flush out whether this idea could be in an ‘A-journal’. The worst outcome is for an idea to work perfectly yet have no chance to be published. Third, I try to run a quick study to see if the idea seems promising at all. If it works, I try to quickly replicate it so I’ll know I have something real. If it fails at first, I’ll give it one more shot if I think the idea is super promising. If it works at first and fails on the replication, then I’ll often give it one more go as a sort of tiebreaker.
Well, till now, I don’t find my life easy. But, there is a difference. People who find it effortless, in reality, it is enjoyment. We- Arts students enjoy their work. Of course, we do have fun. Otherwise, what is the point? Writing papers for journals, Thesis, Reading innumerable books, Going to conferences and refresher courses and meeting some real learned people from all over the world, I mean – just some people are lucky enough to have this.
Science is great, but an Arts degree is neither the dead-beat option nor a route to unemployment.









Friday, December 12, 2014

When your relationship makes you GRUMPY..

It has been long since I wrote something sensible. Well, I am really not sure, if what I am going to pen down will seem logical. But, the topic is quite “in” these days. So, why not give a thought to it!!

To any of my dear readers who are dating -

I guess that most of you have or will at some point be in a relationship that just makes you feel directionless. But let's throw this in there to make things tricky...Perhaps your partner actually has many great qualities.  They might even be kind to you and be on the same page with you in many areas, etc...But because of a few things, you still feel troubled or anxious, you still wonder if "this is the one". You still have that pit in your gut because you can't decide what to do.  Perhaps something about the partner just holds you back and makes you wonder if this really is what you want in a partner. And...that feeling doesn't go away.  Ugh.  Maybe there are good days.  But no matter how much you try, no matter how many justifications you try to make, no matter how many months or years go by, you can't completely shake that feeling that you just don't feel totally at peace with this person - or with the idea of moving forward.

Have you ever been in this situation? I am sure, most of the people do fall in this state.  It is AGONIZING.  My heart goes out so much to anyone trying to make a difficult decision like that.  If I can help, I'd love to...

Here's a tip....


Imagine the day you might marry this person.  Would it make sense to get married with that same kind of awful feeling? That same kind of pit in your stomach? Would you want to force yourself through your wedding day, even though in your gut you feel a little sick?  (And no, I'm not talking about butterflies here.)  And, would you want to have these same thoughts and worries about your wife or your husband during your marriage?

Please tell me the answer is NO!

So, the way I see it - you have 1 option  left:

1.  Do the hardest thing ever and end the relationship. 
The only thing worse than ending a relationship is being unable -- or unwilling -- to recognize when it's time to let go. Sometimes we keep investing in the relationship because we're attached, and then we start telling ourselves that since we've invested so much, it must be worth something -- and around and around it goes.
Now, I'm not someone who advocates jumping ship the minute things get hard. I believe that our primary need in life is long-term relationships, and the only way to build deep, sustaining, nourishing ones is to weather and resolve many conflicts and problems. We need to keep hope alive, as hope is one of the greatest virtues we have. But it's critical to distinguish between hoping and merely wishing. Hope is objective -- it requires evidence and concrete reasons to sustain it.

I know - this can be painful - and might even practically feel like a divorce.  But if the relationship is causing you so much turmoil, it's essential that you are honest with yourself and honest with your partner.  But know that if you choose to end it, you WILL survive!! You really will!  In the moment, it can feel like the end of the world.  But it truly isn't.  You will be fine.  And your partner can be fine, too. That is, if you both choose to be.  That's the amazing thing about life - we all can choose how we react to our circumstances.  And by the way, there ARE many, many wonderful people out there!  Sometimes we get stuck thinking, "This is my only chance to get married." And it just isn't true!

And no matter what you do for yourself and your relationship - - I say to go with your gut.

I've lived my whole life that way and it has served me so well - even when things haven't worked out. The thing is, if you're not being true to yourself, it's practically like walking around with a ton of bricks on your back. It just feels awful and it can poison so much of your life.  So, pay attention.  Don't ignore your deep down gut feelings, intuition, or divine inspiration. I really, really do think that deep down, we usually know what we should do regarding these sorts of matters.  We know what is good for us.  We just need to be brave enough and bold enough to follow through.